Caples: Time for the annual reminder, hockey parents

Photo by Michael Caples/MiHockey
Photo by Michael Caples/MiHockey

By @MichaelCaples

It’s only October, and I’ve heard plenty already.

Coaches yelling. Parents yelling. You know, the usual.

To think it’s only October…

Taking photos at various games and tournaments throughout the hockey season puts me in a unique situation at youth hockey games. I’m right there on the glass, standing amongst the parents or the coaches, snapping away and trying to blend in.

That means I get to hear the commentary and the yelling and the negative feedback.

Last week alone, I heard a parent-child conversation at intermission begin with, “wake the [blank] up.” I’ll let you piece the rest of that together – both with who said the line and what the missing word was. That was at a ’00 hockey game, so, you know, that’s bantams.

I’ve heard parents scream at referees already, too, at even younger age groups.

Did I mention that it’s October?

What could possibility be so important to merit such treatment?

I’ve seen a lot of hockey games at a lot of different levels of hockey. The main thing that I have learned is that in the grand scheme of things, one game doesn’t matter. A Friday morning tournament game in September doesn’t impact your child’s future. It doesn’t even impact their season that much.

What does matter is the lessons that they learn during that game and the behaviors they see from the people around them. Do you want to be a good influence on them or a bad one?

Kids have to learn how to lose. They have to learn how to deal with a questionable call from a referee. They have to learn how to battle through adversity and deal with disappointing outcomes.

I hope that you are one of the parents that help them through those situations in positive ways. Cussing out the ref isn’t going to get that call changed. Yelling at a child through the glass isn’t going to make them improve their skill set overnight.

I understand it. I know the time that goes into this sport; the commitment that families make to hockey is incredible. It’s mind-blowing, really, and I applaud all of you who make it possible for a child to be on the ice.

It doesn’t make it OK for you to scream and yell from the stands, though. Make sure that your kids learn something every time they’re skating, and not that it’s a new insult for the guys in the stripes. Teach them that the only way to get through adversity on the ice is by working harder and practicing and competing, not by complaining.

You and your child only get one shot at this. Make the most of it, and make everything positive while you’re at the rink.

See you there.